Doing Business In Deep Waters and Getting a Yes For Help

I just listened to a talk from one of my favorite inspirational speakers. The talk was about "Doing Business in Deep Waters". The speaker talked about people doing extraordinary things and how to spend your time. If you’re going to do anything great in life there is always going to be opposition, setbacks, delays, and critics. Many people get discouraged because of these things. People will ask themselves “why is this happening to me?” The answer is that you’re breaking new ground because you’re making progress. Those that go into deep waters with big dreams are going to face big challenges. Being in deep waters means that you’re not in the shallow waters with ordinary problems. When you’re in deep waters you’re trying to make a mark... you’re a history maker... you’re a world changer.

You need to know there are always going to be critics, and when you have big dreams you cannot expect ordinary problems. People don't talk about average people; they talk about extraordinary people. So take it as a complement when you are criticized, because it goes with the territory. You may try to move forward but find yourself facing major challenges. This is because you have a major destiny, and because you’re an extraordinary person you will face challenges. The good news is that there are people out there willing to help you with these challenges and help you come through those obstacles. Be selective in how and who you spend your time with. The critics that come against you will only bring you back to shallow waters and waste your time. Don't lose sleep over this, but stay in the deep waters and do what you’re destined to do. Set your face like flint and run your own race.

Getting a Yes for Help 

Often times when we are trying to move forward and overcome obstacles we don't know where to turn. When we reach out for help the challenge becomes getting people to say YES to our request. I am passionate about mentoring and paying it forward by helping those in need. I continue to try to create new ways to help build bridges for those that are looking for help and those that are willing to help. Connecting people has been one of my passions and this is the reason I created a mobile app called Hitch+. Hitch+ will give you the ability to explore daily insightful content, to share advice and easily get connected with great experts.

We are also excited to now have the ability to get you connected with over 10,000 experts through Clarity.fm. Clarity is a community of experts who want to help and have created a better way to scale the delivery of their expertise. If you want to know more about how you can get help or be involved with helping others then read Clay Herbert's article: The New Way to Say No (that's actually yes).

We love to hear from you. Please join us to share your dreams, give and get advice, and connect with great experts. Click on the logo below to find out how.

What I Learned About Goals From Building a Toy Wagon

I am the youngest of 4 siblings so most of my childhood was spent trying to prove to my sister and two brothers that I can do things on my own. I had the fortune of growing up with middle-class parents in which my Dad had his own service business and my stay-at-home mom worked at her fine craft of sewing window coverings for her customers. My Dad and Papa taught me how to work a hammer, screwdriver, wrench, etc., so in most cases I am a pretty good handyman. I enjoy working with my hands but at times I don't read instructions well and tend to go about building or assembling things on my own.

Read the instructions.

As a kid, I was great at tearing stuff apart but not so great at putting it all back together, which in turn required me to ask for help. This great skill and art of "handyman-ship" progressed right into fatherhood. I remember my first son getting a Radio Flyer wagon. This classic unit came with the typical "some assembly required" printed on the box. So this great handyman headed off with his 12 drawer toolbox to build a simple toy vehicle. To me it was a no-brainer, 10 minutes...15 minutes tops, to get the job done. I mean how hard was it to assemble 2 axles, 2 sets of wheels, carriage and a pull handle. Instructions...are you kidding me?  I'm pretty good at visualizing how things should be put together. So this baby was done in no time flat and ready to ride.

Now came the time to test the fine looking machine out. My son was pumped, he hopped in and off we went down the street. Things were rolling along nicely. It was easy to pull with its nice big wheels but as we headed down the street all of a sudden it began riding a little rough and my son soon became worried that this ultimate street machine was not as stable as he had thought. As I looked back I saw that the wheels had some wobble in them. WHAT!? How could this be? This thing was brand new! I mean this fine handyman put it together -- how can there be anything wrong? So off we went back to the shop to see what was wrong.

Test and you might wobble but adjust accordingly.

As we began to inspect the wagon I realized that the wheel caps were making the wheels wobble. Maybe I needed to take a quick glance at the instructions. I reviewed the step-by-step instructions and realized that the 4 washers, that for some reason were unused and leftover, and the requirements of using a flat surface and piece of wood to install the wheels must be followed to ensure the wheels were installed on straight. Great, now I had to take the wheel caps off and re-assemble. Pulling the wheel caps off was not an easy job because once in place they tended to be clamped there for good. I made an attempt to remove them but 3 out of 4 became unsalvageable. So now what? I am somewhat of a perfectionist so I needed to get new wheel caps. Off I went to the store and explained to one of the store clerks my dilemma, in which he chuckled and said, "Didn't you read the instructions?" Embarrassingly I admitted that, no, I had not, and he took me to the backroom of the store where they assemble bikes and toys. He looked at me, smiled, handed me 3 new wheel caps and said, "Here, now go back and read the instructions step-by-step". I smile (red-faced) and said, "Yes of course".

Reaching you goals might take longer than you think BUT
don't give up!

So what turned out to be a 10-15 minute job was now close to 2-hours. Lesson learned... well for this project anyway.  From then on my other two sons had great Radio Flyer wagons done and assembled in 15 minutes flat. No problem.

As I reflect on 2012 and what was accomplished, there were some goals that got "assembled" well and there were others that wobbled and required some additional instruction and reassembly. At times this is just the way I think and learn or some would call it "learning the hard way".  As I plan my goals for 2013, I really try to visualize what the end result will look like. How I am going to get there? What instructions and help will be required?  Setting goals are great but what's most important to be successful is assembling the proper instructions. I tend not to over analyze things. In fact, I like to look at ways to make them simpler. As mentioned in my previous blog, our goals in life require a process, a series of steps. How we get there requires instruction and some assembly to get it done.

Don't over analyze, keep it simple, reward yourself for the experience knowing the next time will be much easier.

At Mentor+ME, we are here to serve you. If you are looking for help, advice or guidance in career planning/development, business startup or an area of self-improvement, we want to be your connection and resource. Jump on board with us and make 2013 your best year ever!

Don't go it alone.

Get some... #NewThinking.

Creating an idea is easy. Turning it into a business is hard. The startup journey for me has been one of ups and downs. I have to admit getting support and advice on your journey can either drag you down or allow you to leap in to a new way of thinking.

I am a person at times not to ask for help and think I need to do things on my own. This journey of startup has caused me to really seek out advice from my mentors or an expert. Most recently, I have been dealing with some personal issues that have caused me to seek help. So I setup a meeting with one of my mentors, Norm, to get support. I presented to Norm my issues and the actions I was going to take to resolve. All I was really expecting was to get a confirmation on these decisions. Instead I got raked over the coals about my direction. Norm asked me some very pointed questions about my thinking of which some I couldn't answer. I then proceeded to ask his advice. What I got from Norm was a new way of thinking on these issues with a fresh approach. I'm thankful I had the hour with Norm as it really put some things into perspective for me. Sometimes we just need this to formulate a new way of thinking to our problems, decisions, issues or plans.

Let me encourage you today don't go it alone and take the leap to get a mentor that can help shape you to #NewThinking.

What experiences have you had with getting advice that changed your thinking. Comment on it here or tweet with a #NewThinking. I love to hear from you and keep the discussion going!

New Thinking.

Many people continue to not achieve success. The problem is, they don’t know what is their problem. 

Most people are limited to their own experience and knowledge.

Are you SO VERY SURE of your real problem that’s obstructing you for success?

Chances are, unfortunately, you don’t.  You need a different point of reference in order to solve your “problem” to success. That’s it. That’s why you read books. Talk to people. And be humble of other people’s feedback.

Albert Einstein said it well… “We can’t solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.”

If you need help and a new point of reference check out Mentorplus.me. It just might be the "New Thinking" you need to solve your problem. 

10 excuses why we fear giving and getting advice

I have been doing a lot of soul searching over the past year in regards to my personal and professional life. One thing that always draws me to making decisions is the importance of asking for help, advice, guidance and assistance from someone, a mentor, who has gone through similar experiences. It's has not always been easy for me to do this and at times I become very fearful of it. But as human beings we must help each other, it's in our nature to share our life experiences in order to get better at what we do.

Asking for advice begins when we start to understand the teaching on the subject. We are blessed with these tremendous online tools and resources that allow us to get information and advice at our finger tips. We are all dependent on each other for help and when we overcome that fear of asking, it opens doors to get us where we want to go.

Many people fail to seek out experts for advice because of various misunderstandings and excuses:

1. They think the concept of mentoring doesn't apply to them.

2. They don’t believe it works today.

3. They’re too embarrassed to admit that they need help.

4. They’re too proud to ask for help.

5. They’re afraid to help others because their advice might not be accepted.

6. They’re too embarrassed to confess their mistakes or failures to someone else.

7. They’re so consumed with their own needs and don’t have time to sympathize or provide help for others.

8. They have problems in their own lives and doubt that can help anyone else.

9. They don’t feel worthy to be used.

10. It’s easier to send a card or email than to engage in serious help for others.

Are you allowing to be used as an agent of help? Many people are going through difficulties and need someone to listen and give them great advice. You don’t have to be a leader or senior to be used. If you’ll allow yourself to make an effort and find someone who needs your expertise, your effective advice will accomplish much.

If your looking for great self-help, career, business,or startup advice, Mentorplus.me is a community that offers online mentoring with a social purpose by helping you do what you do... only better. Join us to EXPLORE, DREAM and DISCOVER.

What's holding you up?

Online Social Mentoring - connecting for a purpose

5 reasons to give and get great advice.

Today people and business startups are hustling to make connections and network on Facebook, Twitter and LinkedIn, but what we are discovering is even though it’s nice to have a great list of friends and colleagues to develop outposts, there is a better way to get the answers you need than these larger social networks are able to provide. 

Special-interest communities like Mentor+me attract members who know that being successful is more about quality than quantity. Users looking for solutions and resources seek out advice from others with answers which is often a great starting point in developing a longer term mentor relationship. This is the easiest and most efficient way to establish an informal relationship with someone who wants to really help. 

Here are 5 reasons to give and get great advice:

1. Connecting for a purpose 

Special interest-based social sites like Mentor+me give you all the networking tools that we know and love like publishing your profile. Your profile can be found in searches by typing in a word such as “startup advice”, “need help with a career change”, “should I get an MBA?”, “what do I need to do to become a manager?” Instead of connecting with people randomly, you connect with people on specific issues in a community whose sole purpose is to help its members. This is social networking for a specific social purpose. 

2. People are experts in their own life experiences 

People tend to want to speak to individuals they understand or who speak their own lingo. If people have had experiences like: having a great career in marketing; a career change; a personal crisis such as a health issue; or had success with a a startup business, then this gives people an opportunity to connect with the things that are important to them. 

3. Raise your personal stock 

Members are rewarded for engaging in the community, whether you are a Mentee earning a way to “Mentor” status based on your contributions to the community, or you are a Mentor who engages in online relationships and is recognized as a thought leader in your area of expertise. 

There are all kinds of benefits to this, some of which include: professional advancement, speaking opportunities, self-promotion or just plain bragging rights. Sometimes you might not get the respect you deserve in the workplace or your personal life, but among your Mentor+me peers you will be given the respect you appreciate. 

4. Personal and Professional Referrals 

Tapping into an online community like Mentor+me  is the most efficient and effective way to find peers who are similar, enabling a wealth of useful information to be shared. 

This type of support group can keep peers up-to-date on a news article or latest technique for accomplishing a task. Peer recommendations carry a lot more weight then a Google search result. 

5. Advice you can trust 

Face it, when making a decision we often seek out advice from people who have gone down the same path. Mentor+me focuses on the people you want to reach and engage. 

Mentor+me is online mentoring with a social purpose by helping you do what you do... only better!